Election Day Idea

NixonYowsaIt’s Election Day. And as I get ready to vote, I feel compelled to “throw the bums out.” This has been one of the worst Congresses in the history of Congress, and that’s saying a lot. It’s an embarrassment.

No matter what your political point of view, I think we can all agree on one thing: our current crop of politicians are entirely useless to anyone but themselves, or the special interest groups that keep them in power. This is true of all politicians, from local school board leaders to the clowns in our nation’s capital. They range from pandering fools to extremist idiots.

But there’s a problem with the “throw the bums out” approach, which has often attracted people to extremist movements like the Tea Party. You never know what kind of bums are waiting to get in. They could just as easily be worse than what we already have. And at least the incumbents have faced a few years of media scrutiny, whereas the new wingnuts have only endured that kind of scrutiny during the campaign. They just have to behave long enough to get elected, which most megalomaniacs can handle. Again, the rise and fall of the Tea Party is a testament to the pitfalls of this de-bumification philosophy.

MFpunitiveSo here’s my idea. Instead of simply voting for a specific candidate, those who vote to re-elect the incumbent should also have the option of voting to have one of the candidate’s fingers removed. This counts as a vote for the incumbent, like any other vote, except that – if re-elected, and if a majority of those who voted for for the decapitation of a digit – then they would have to have a finger surgically removed. Think of it as taking a finger from a politician who gave us the finger.

Now before you rush to judgment here, this is about more than simply chopping off political fingers. It’s an incentive, and I believe a powerful one. First of all, it will eliminate those candidates who are simply looking to push their agenda or line their pockets, which I estimate is around 90 percent of our current crop of politicians. And it will also ensure that those who do get elected work hard enough for their constituents to ensure that they won’t feel betrayed when the next election comes around.

Holding a political office should be about serving your constituents. Right now, it’s all about serving your contributors, and your ideology, and ensuring above all else that you amass and retain as much powers as possible. I think we can change this…one finger at a time.